It is safe to use ebay again

I wish I were talented enough to make the dresses Anna has been photographed in but the answer is no. Some have been purchased on a web site called 'The best dressed child' and other were from ebay. This one was from ebay and really looks as though it was only worn once or twice.

I just love these types of clothes but paying full price would kill my budget. If you like this dress just wait until you see the Christmas one. The dress pictured below is the one I will use for Thanksgiving. I was inspired by Kristine's pictures of her children in the leaves.

My sister and I have been a bit obsessed with e bay. Do your remember the Sunshine family? We used to play with that for hours. Having Sloan, Hans and Anna all together reminds us of times when we were young.

So now that we have won the whole Sunshine family we are trying for some vintage little people. I think with Christmas right around the corner and all the changes in the family right now we are feeling a little sentimental. I am hoping to win an airplane and a house for them to play with.

Isn't it funny how you can picture things from your childhood with such detail and how it evokes fond memories. I wonder what things Anna will remember? I wonder if Sloan, Hans and Anna will have fond memories of the time that they had to spend together because we had to leave them to help my Mother. Wouldn't that be cool if their memories of this point in time were all filled with the fun time that they spent together.

Fall days are here!

Fall days is there anything better...

The magic playhouse...

The weather finally broke last week enough for Gerard and his Father to put together Anna's playhouse that was given to her by my friends from work. Anna and I were out when they put it together, honestly I really think she had no idea what it was in the box.

I got the call to come home that it was ready so home we went. When we got in for her is was business as usual but the three of us knew that would change as soon as she saw the magic playhouse.

We called her out to the back deck and she walked onto the deck spotted the playhouse then did a double take. I am pretty sure I was not seen her walk that fast ever as she sprinted on the deck to see it close up. She inspected everything and the grin on her face was from ear to ear. When she went down the slide her first instinct was to clap when she hit the bottom. Excited really does not accurately describe how she was playing on it.

Seeing these moments makes the hard times worth it. To hear her giggle and see the excitement on her face gives me strength. We will make it through all the hard times as long as I can reflect on these precious moments.

So the next day you would have thought that she would have ran out to the magic playhouse as soon as her eyes were open. Nope! I was shocked but okay with it because I knew Sloan was coming over to play with her so I waited. She played with everything like usual and was happy never going to the back door.

Once Sloan got here we took them out back I waited to see her reaction which was the same as the night before. Then I caught her looking around the back yard. I think in her mind she was expecting the magic playhouse to be gone as fast as it had arrived. I also think she was looking to make she that there were no other magic playhouses in the yard that she did not see.

So why am I calling it the magic playhouse well because it has magic powers of course. Sloan and Anna were still playing at lunch time. We made there lunch and took it to the magic playhouse. For the first time Anna not only ate a chicken nugget but she ate two. Here is where the magic part comes in she will only eat them in the playhouse so far. Who knows I may have to dust off the snow so that she will eat. I guess I better get a warm winter coat this year.

First time not putting her to sleep and biospy report is back

Where has the time gone. I can not believe that Tuesday was the last time I posted something. Not that things have not been moving and shaking around here it has just been too crazy to take 5 minutes to think straight.

I went back to work 2 nights in a row. Of course I worried about leaving her but the reports were good. She and Jillian did well in my absence and Anna fell asleep without crying. Here is where the but gets inserted. My first night putting her to sleep was like burning in H.

She actually did not fall asleep until well after 1 am and woke back up at 5 am. To add to the sleeplessness she refused her nap. I tried everything, a walk, warm bottle, rocking, car ride. Nothing! I have not seen this level of sheer exhaustion in her since my trip home.

I know in my heart that this was a result of me not being home for those 2 nights. Me putting her to bed has been the one thing that has been consistent. So tonight I was a bit nervous. I think it went well in total it took about 2 hours to get her down which is about the normal amount of time it takes me. I know this should get easier, I hope and pray this gets easier.

I know that so many of you have gone through this same transition of returning to work and you feel my pain. This are the times that I wonder why the movement to a dual income family has been the way of the future. If I could stay home I would, believe me I have not stopped thinking or trying to find a way to do it.

Now the news that I hoped that I never thought I would have to say. I got the biopsy report back on Friday. Yes my Mother has lung cancer wow that is hard to say, write and think. When I first started this journey with her I was certain that the biopsy report was going to come back with this news but on the day of her biopsy I had convinced myself that she did not have cancer. Funny how your mind works. I guess when I got the actual report I was shocked and relieved to finally have a name attached to what it is. Adenocarcinoma.

I had to process the information for myself and I will tell you that yes the glass is half full not half empty. I believe that the type of cancer that she has is one that is curable with surgery. I am very confident that the surgeon that she we have chosen is to right man for the job. So Wednesday we will travel to NYC to discuss her options and have her pre-surgical testing completed. We will make it through this bump in the road.

Today is a beautiful day

I woke up late today. In guess my body was tired from yesterday. Even Anna is still sleeping and it is close to 10 am. My Mother did well during the biopsy of her lung. I hope to know something by the end of the week. I pray it is all good.

In other news please stop bidding against me on e bay. The cat is out of the bag a couple of her dresses are from e bay. Yes, I am trying to win one for Thanksgiving so I will let you all know when you can start bidding again.

In other news I have made the decision to go back to work this week. The decision was a difficult one but a necessary one for right now. I am sad at the thought of leaving her but I know she will survive and still thrive. I will not lie I had a very hard time making that decision. I hope and pray that it was the right decision.

So today the rain has finally stopped and the sun is shining. My sister is still here in town with my Mother so I will probably be spending the day with them. What a beautiful day today will be.

Hans' Christening

Gerard and I are so lucky to have Jaime, Greg and Hans so close. Actually, I have quite a bit of family who lives close by so I am extra lucky. Jaime and Greg asked us to be Hans' God parents so not only do I have a Great nephew but I am also his God mother.

I had told Jaime that she could pick out any outfit she wanted for him and that we would buy it for his big day. Instead she walked into my sewing room and picked out the fabrics that she wanted. I will post a picture after I get her approval. So Friday we tried on his gown and that is when I realized that I had not finished it. So bright and early this morning I had to finish the closures and make a bonnet. Yup, she wanted him in a gown. Yup, that is me grinning from ear to ear. He was so sweet in church.I will never forget the way his whole face lite up when he heard the priest bless the water.

By the way there was plenty of water to go around the island where the church was has been flooded for 2 days making getting to the church quite difficult but we all made it. Gerard almost did not make it as he was coming from work and had been fighting flooding for over an hour near where he works, then by home then by the church. Literately, the priest said will the God parents please come up and he never missed a step and walked down the aisle straight onto the alter.

Anna was fun at church too, she was allowed to come up with us because surprise, surprise she only wanted me or him no one else. When she saw the water off came the shoes because she was thinking this is great lets all take a dip.

I know I should be sleeping but I am waiting for Gerard's parents to pick up Dottie. Tomorrow is an early day and I will be on the road for NYC by 3:45 am for my Mother's biopsy at 6:30am. I still feel like I have so much to still do.

So how was work you ask?

Yes I was scheduled to go back to work on Thursday night and Friday night but for reasons I can not discuss that plan was changed. No my Mother is doing well, nervous but still doing well. I found out on Friday that her heart is very healthy and she can have surgery if needed. She is scheduled for a biopsy on Monday morning and I am hoping for the best.

The plan for work right now is that I am do back on Wednesday and Thursday night. I have not decided if I am going back as of yet. We are looking into many different options right now. Leaving her home without me is something that I am having a hard time with. I know she cries a lot at bedtime and I just want to be there for her.

As for today I think we might be going to see my sister at her son's school fair. She is too funny she started a booth at the fair where she is going to sell bags made of recycled denim but the funny thing is she does not sew. My poor Mother and I were roped into helping. We did have fun making the bags. I always love a challenge.

It is almost 8:30 am and she is still sleeping. Yeah for me. I think I am off to the shower before she wakes up!

Gerard exposed??

Yes you all are right that was Gerard! Well sort of! That was Gerard senior also know as Chippy or Poppy. Gerard does look very similar to both his parents. That is a typical conversation at dinner believe it or not. I consider him a bit of a Mr. Potato head he has his Mother's eyes and mouth but his Father's nose. He has dark hair with a wave that has straighten some over the last couple of years or maybe it is the crew cut that he is usually sporting.

He is slim and I think it is dreadful to say he weights about 12 lbs less then I do but I am working on that. I am adopting Jaime's philosophy she wants to always weigh less then her husband. Yes, Jaime made him gain 3 lbs when she was pregnant and Greg did it happily Greg is tall and slim too.

I have to say you all gave me quite the chuckle right when I needed one the most. I had to go to NYC yesterday and this was the first day Anna was awake when I left. It was dreadful to see her melt down at the door. My Mother is doing very well. We had to obtain what is called cardiac clearance before she can have surgery. On the one test that she needed to have there seems to be a small heart issue that might need to be handled prior to any surgery.

She is scheduled for a lung biopsy on Monday. The results of that will be the determining factor of where we go from there. I am praying that it is nothing but scar tissue as I think we may have actually dodged 2 of the 4 issues right now but I will not know for certain until next week. The outlook today is light years better then when I first posted about my Mother. I can not help to think of everyone who is praying for her.

Big truck even BIGGER surprize

Before court I was very fearful of having a baby shower. Quite honestly I have never had much luck when it comes to these types of affairs for me. My Mother insisted on having a shower so I conceded to let her give me one and it was beautiful only one problem. Because of many reasons only family members were invited.

I think they scaled it back because I literately broke my arm 2 days after I agreed to let them have it. Although you all my think that I handled it well I admit I was probably a bit snappy, wait I know I was a bit snappy. I remember thinking as I looked around the room that I was missing my friends.

You have to understand they have had to endure endless nights of me talking to them until I was blue in the face about when I would go to Russia to get my baby. So I will say that I think I just felt like something was missing. They had scheduled a baby shower for me during my leave that I canceled because of doctor appointments for my Mother.

Which brings me to yesterday morning. This big truck pulled up in front of my house and out popped a man to deliver this!!!!

The box is really big just like the hearts of those who gave it to Anna and I. I can tell you that I can hardly contain my excitement and have already started to pester Gerard to put it together. I just know that Anna will have so much fun playing with it once she realizes what it is.

The words thank you seem to be not enough. I told them that she had EVERYTHING and quite honestly I meant it. They just love to prove me wrong that is why I love them!

Is there anything better then bubbles?

First off when we bought this home the back yard was dirt. Yup dirt. To say the least the people who owned our house before me made it our home did not care for it at all. Literately the house was unlivable for about 5 months. The people who owned it before us drove all the neighbors crazy and not in a good way. To the point where it took them all about 6 months to figure out that we were not them.

So about that I just get so much pleasure from my back yard that it is not even funny. I go out there every day. Anna loves to explore it too. She has started to hide behind the trees that we have planted and that is too cool.

Jillian came over to get her schedule for baby sitting because I will be back to work later this week. Originally I had planned that we would go to the lighthouse but she fell asleep on the way. We opted to head to the store for a gate for the hall instead.

When we got home I could see that Anna needed to unload some of her energy so to the back yard we went. Anna has not really liked bubbles much. I think it was because the first time I tried to blow them for her the solution got in her eye. But today is there anything better then bubbles? No way!












Yes I asked Jillian to hold her because she needs to start because she will be caring for her at night including bedtime. Anna already has a hard time at bed I want her to feel safe with Jillian. These are by far my favorite pictures so far. Sorry Gerard Jillian is much better with the camera then you are.

First REAL pony ride & an ER visit

When we were in Moscow we saw police officers or military personal on horses. The horse sound is the first animal sound that she makes but it is not like what you would expect to hear. She makes a clicking sound with her mouth just like the horses sounded as they would walk by. Of course I love that she picked up on that so I encouraged it. Now when ever she sees an animal that could be a horse she will make that sound.

I have even seen her eye up Dottie and follow her around the room making the sound. You can see her mind working that if Dottie would only stand still she might just be able to mount her for a quick ride. As for Dottie she knows to keep moving when she hears that noise behind her because she thinks she is a human and not a dog and certainly not a horse.

Pam I know you asked a while back about Dottie she is not doing well. She is only eating about 4-5 days of the week. With me traveling to NYC for my Mother she has been staying with Gerard's parents because my house looks more like a day care with 3 small children running/crawling around. I think it is better for Dottie to be there when there is so much happening here. She sits on Gerard's Father's lap like a fur shawl laying around his neck on the back of the couch.

So back to the horse of course. We took Anna to a festival that was a town over yesterday mostly because I read that they would have pony rides. We waited until almost the end of the festival because I figured there would be less people and I was right. When we got there she was just waking up from her nap. What a weird concept for children to fall asleep in one spot then wake up in another.

When she first saw the ponies I think she was in disbelief because the ones that we saw in Moscow were REALLY big. These ones were just the right size for her. I snapped a few pictures before she tired to bust out of her stroller. Then onto the June she went. There is one picture that I absolutely love because she is looking at me and smiling. I was hoping that Gerard had gotten that one and he did.

After the REAL pony ride the carousel was exciting but not nearly as much fun. The last picture is a picture of Anna and I with Gerard's Mother. It is hard to keep Anna still when she see not only water but the carousel too.

As for the ER visit it was for me not Anna. I was fixing her toy when out of the blue a screw driver came my way. At first Anna laughed then when she saw the blood she started to cry. Unfortunately it took off a small chunk of my cheek. so I will have a scar. I am so thankful though that it was me and not her and that I was not seriously hurt. So when I look at that scar that is what I will think.

Did it without me having to ask

I think Jaime and Jillian are getting it more then others in the family. Mostly because they are the only ones that I have left Anna with. I talked with them about how I feed her and to really look at how she is playing. It is funny because the only way I know how to explain it is either she is playing or working.

If she is playing then she will interact with you. She wants to engage you into playing with her. You can see that she is thinking about the doll or toy she is playing with. If it is her baby doll then she is rocking or diapering or making sleep. She will dance and laugh. If you talk to her when she is playing she will look at you. Generally she will talk back to you. She will know where you are in the house or room and come looking for you.

If she is working then you see her take stuff from one room to the next making a pile or straightening something. There is a lot of folding and unfolding of stuff. Wiping still remains one of her favorite "chores" (no she does not have chores yet but she will when she is older). She will spend 30-60 minutes playing with a ribbon if I let her never once looking up for me or trying to engage with me. If you try to call her name or engage her she ignores you or maybe a better way to say it is she just does not process that you want to interact with her. She will not look up to you even when you talk to her. She could careless if you are in the room or not. There is no dancing, smiling laughing just a flat look on her face and eyes no expression at all.

Which brings me to yesterday. Jaime and Jillian know how upset I am that she has not happy or excited to see me when I get home so last night they separated Sloan and Anna with a gate. My sister came into one door and I cam in through the other. That way there were less people for her to process and she was considerably less overwhelmed. She danced and was excited to see me. Actually she grabbed my leg to hug it. This is what Jaime and Jillian came up with on their own. I can take no credit because I did not think of doing it that way.

It makes sense because when Gerard comes in with a group usually he is the only man. Actually side from his Father he is the only man that consistently comes to my home. On the other hand because I have such a large family mostly of women I there is usually a large group of us coming in at once where I just seem to get lost in the mix for her. I never thought of us coming in like that but I will ask that we do it that way in the future so that she has less to process.

As a whole I would like to say that I have seen her grow in leaps and bounds in the area of attachment and bonding. I have more to learn about the process and will be doing some more research about it. Even though I felt prepared I could have read more I admit. I think that I was in no condition to read about it because of the length of time that I waited between getting a referral, trip 1, and coming home. Every time I would pick up a book to start to read about it I would become very upset or depressed. I do not feel totally unprepared and quite honestly reading about other peoples ideas what worked for them is the reason why I even mentioned this. Leaving her is unavoidable right now. I wish it were different but it is not so instead I just need to roll with what comes along.

Pumpkin no I mean apple picking

Because I have had to leave her these past couple of weeks I am trying to make the time that spend with her count. Gerard and I decided that this past Sunday would be a good time to take her pumpkin picking. I really do not like to go when it is cold or wet but Sunday was a crisp 69 degrees with a big blue sky and white puffy clouds you know the type that stand out like cotton balls. I marvel at how beautiful those types of skys are every time I see them. I think that we should always stop and just look at them when they happen.

We tried to get his parents to come but both of their cell phones were off. I have always been the type of person who will drop everything to do something fun. The best fun sometimes is not the planned fun. When we were younger there were times that we would decision at breakfast hey lets go to Virginia today and we would be out the door in no time flat. Sunday reminded me of those times so I guess I really enjoyed it more then I knew I was going to.

We met up with Jaime, Greg, Hans and My sister Julie and drove to the pumpkin patch. It was the best because I was able to sit in the back with her when usually I have to drive. When we got to the patch she instantly knew what her job was. It was the wave at the people on the tractors being taken to the field. I got some great pictures of her sitting on hay until I realized that the father of the year (just teasing)let her play in the dirt about 5 minutes after we got there. Thank goodness for diaper wipes.

I still love these photos of her and our day together. Oh you did not read this wrong I know that they are not pumpkins but when we got to the field there were only 3 pumpkins left so I think we will do this trip again.

Big decisions must be made...

My maternity leave is coming to a close. Gerard are talking about a number of options right now so I feel like my head is about to explode. I have an opportunity that comes around about once every 10 years or so. It would change my work schedule completely. Will I do it? To be quite honest I do not even know. I am trying my best to weigh out all my options before I make the decision.

This past 6 weeks were not what I wanted them to be or envisioned them to be. My plan had been to stay with her and not leave her but instead I have had to leave her about 2 times every week for the last 3 weeks. When I say that I mean leave before she is up and only get home in time for a quick bath, book and to bed.

Yesterday she did well but last week it took her almost 3 days to start looking at me again. As far as the eating when Gerard or I are not here she eats even less. These are all things that I must consider when I make my decision and believe me it is a hard decision. Yesterday she ate 2 bites of a string cheese and 2 ounces of kefir until he got home.

I have been extremely lucky because I have been able to leave her with the same 2 people each time. They tell me that sometimes she does better but yesterday she was just too busy to eat. She was so happy when I got home to see my Mother, sister and this time she acknowledged me so that is an improvement. Gerard said that she squeal with delight when he came in and took him straight to the kitchen for something to eat then dragged him around the house to show him things.

Last night for me she did go to sleep better then on other nights quite honestly I think that by the time I get home she is spent, exhausted and just overtired. Jaime and Jillian told me that she was looking for me and that she brought them the "Where is our Mommy?" book. Which by the way I LOVE. It is a quick read and has neat little flip-flaps and a spot to put your picture in the back. The book encourages affection and also encourages her to seek me out so it has been a true find.

Settings are changed

No not for the comments but on my computer. I walked away from it for about 2 seconds to answer the door and I heard tap, tap, tap. That quick she was not only up on the dinning room table she was typing quite a long letter to someone. In the process she changed some setting that makes the letters look a little funny. I hope I can either get used to it or fix it. She is fast and busy!

I was asked the question

A while back someone had asked me what happened when I thought I had lost Anna right before I was to travel for my court date. At that point in time I was not prepared to answer the question for fear that it would upset an already delicate situation.

Now that everything is final I will answer the question. A family member from Anna's birth family had wanted to stop the adoption. Now before anyone starts to judge this person for not stepping up sooner I will tell you that she did not have the ability to support Anna plain and simple. I do believe that she loved and still loves Anna. My hopes are to be able to make contact with this person and I have reached out to someone who I think will be able to help me.

Was I angry when this happened? No not really more sad for me, Anna and this person. Sad for me that I thought I was not going to see Anna again and get to be her Mother. Sad for Anna because I knew the life that she would be facing basically a life in an orphanage not with this family member. Yes also sad for this person who was trying to stop the adoption because it was a family link that she did not want to have broken and to some degree I broke it for her. I am sure that she thinks that Anna will not know about her birth family or that I will portray them in an unfavorable light. What this person does not understand is that had the adoption been stopped Anna was not going to be given to her either. She would have just been in a never ending circle of not having a family who could both love and take care of her.

How real was the threat? I will tell you that I traveled for court really not knowing what how the court would rule. I even remember the Director of the baby house and Social Worker discussing it on the steps of the court house before we entered and they were even a bit nervous. Perhaps this is the reason why my court case was so long. One thing I can tell you is that I never felt at ease until she was in my arms forever.

My situation was very different from most. If you are in the process of a Russian adoption do not use my experience to change your path. Many have had no issues and courts cases have been very short.

Unlike many domestic adoptions contact with the birth family is not typical with international. I will be honest that is what did drew me to international adoption. Selfish I know but I did not think that I was cut out for an open adoption then. What about now you ask? Well maybe but I am still not of the confident YES variety.

Open adoption works I believe in many situations and actually benefits all who are involved but in order for that to work all parties have to be on board. I can tell you that I would never have been able to look another woman in the eye and tell her that an open adoption would work for us. That would be a lie. I would never be able to put her fears to rest because I did not believe that I was capable of doing that because of my own fears. So instead of making a false promise I choose to have a closed adoption when I was making my decision on international verses domestic, closed verses open or semi-open.

Family is important and as Anna's forever mother I know that even though she is not asking questions now it will only be a matter of time before she does. Will we keep her past a secret? No! Her past and birth family are a part of her and I want her to know as much about them as she can. This person has been hurt in my opinion by my adoption of Anna. This was never my intention and I think as an adoptive mother it is hard to see the side of the birth family. I want to them to feel happy that I have Anna but this may never be the case.

Anna may be the only child I ever have, coming from a large family I do want Anna to know the joys (pardon the pun) of having an extended family. At this point in time a second adoption is not in the cards. Russian adoption is expensive and even though I was able to keep down much of my costs the amount of money that I spent was more then I had budgeted for this so unless I win the lottery or come into a bunch of money I am thinking for now that I am done. For now I want to focus on saving in Anna's college fund.

I can tell you that I think about the many orphans not only in Russia but in the world daily. I believe that God makes it hard for you to forget the things that you see in an orphanage even a very well run orphanage for a reason. I know that I want to help and will help others it may not be in the form of a home or as a Mother but just maybe my experience and openness will change someone else's mind who is on the fence about adoption.

She's a Diva

The girl loves her glasses. No pair of sun glasses are safe in this house.

First time on a boat

Gerard and I love the water this is pretty obvious. Gerard loves to fish and jet ski we want her to love the water just as much. Gerard can be quite demanding. We often laugh that he makes lists for everyone because he does. Then he checks up on you too which I find even funnier at times.

If we are all sitting at the table he will run through each of us and ask us how we are doing on 'the list'. You have to understand that I really do not take his 'lists' seriously even though he does. I do not get hammered nearly as much as his parents do. AM his sister usually tells him she is going to make him a list and that usually stops the list making with the comment by Gerard of "AM that's terrible, don't make me a list!"

One thing on Grandma's list was a new life jacket for Anna. We take water safety seriously and believe it or not life jackets do need to be replaced from time to time. She got her orders to get a new one so that he could take her out on the boat before she her birthday. He wants to tell her "See you were driving a boat when you were 1. Technically she is closer to 2 but who is counting.

I actually got a couple of great pictures of the 2 of them. I have been waiting to post them in the hopes that he would let me expose his face but it is not going to happen yet. Here is a picture of her on "driving" one of his boats. Maybe next time guys. I think he is softening to the idea.

It has been a long week and it is only Thursday

Tuesday and Wednesday I had to leave Anna with my nieces. She is doing well being with them and I am so thankful. I have been able to make it home in time to put her to bed. Last night was more difficult but I think she thought that I was not going to be here in the morning again. The trips to NYC would be so difficult for Anna and unfortunately until we have a specific diagnosis I will want to continue to go with my Mother. Being there first hand and hearing what the doctors are saying believe it or not eases me and my Mother.

Yesterday as my Mother was having her test done I walked around the American Girl doll store. I have to say even I was overwhelmed in there. You can buy lots of "stuff" for them. I will have the exercise some self control when I bring her there. I was hoping maybe next year for her birthday. On my walk I also located the Russian Tea Room. I think this will also be on my list of things to do with her. I love tea parties and I think she will too.

When I was in Russia I had purchased a chocolate bar. Russian believe that their chocolate is the best and quite honestly I have tasted my fair share of chocolate and I think I might agree. A couple of weeks ago I gave her a taste of chocolate. Here is a picture of her first taste. Funny how she just knew it was okay to eat. Last night she ate the last bit of the chocolate bar. I will have to see if Uncle Bucky can get some more for her. He live in Brooklyn and many who live there are Russian so I do not think that it will be much of a problem.



Things are a little complicated with what is going on with my Mother right now (no Mom I have a handle on it do not worry). I know in the past couple of weeks I have not been great about blogging. This blog is not something that I am willing to give up just yet. How else can I remember everything.

I know that recently I have been so preoccupied with what is going on with my Mother rather then putting things on here about Anna and our home. I am considering starting another blog for the purposes of writing about those feelings. One thing I have learned is that once I have it out there I feel so much better. Without my blog I am not quite sure how well I would have fared. I am considering starting one for my Mother to use as well.

Next week will also be busy. At least 2 more trips to NYC. As soon as they know what we are facing I will feel better. I will be honest I think that the care that she is receiving at this hospital is the best and I am quite a critic believe me. I have results of all her tests within about an hour and a plan of action too. That is amazing believe me. If I do start another blog I will let you all know.