Vacation wrap up

I might be the only person in the world who never knows what time my plane leaves. I arrived home on Saturday at 5 pm the funny thing is I thought my plane was to leave Florida at 9:30 pm. When I realized that I was close to missing my plane a little bit of panic set in but I made it to the airport with just enough time to grab a soda and board.

Gerard met us at the airport to pick us up. What a difference from nine months ago. Gerard came home early so it had been a week since he had left us in Fort Myers Beach. On the plane I kept telling Anna that we were going to see Daddy. Dressed in her pink bunny rabbit PJs and white sandals Anna ran into his arms and gave him the biggest hug possible. When she figured out that Papa was in the car waiting outside she really lost it and dragged Gerard out side before I could grab the car seat off the baggage belt.

I think this vacation was good in so many ways for Anna. I will not bore you much but for the most part we spent the rest of our vacation on the beach or in the pool except for the Pirate ship. Anna enjoyed getting a tattoo and convinced the pirate to give her another one. On Wednesday I was going to meet up with another blogger (Stephanie) friend but her schedule was very tight but I am sure there will be a next time. Her daughter Grace came home from Russia on the same exact day as Anna. Stephanie and her husband are expecting well expecting from Africa to be exact. I think you will enjoy reading what she writes because I know many of us feel like adoption has changed our lives for the better.

On the drive home from the airport exhaustion set in for Anna and she fell asleep for about an hour. Ten days is a long time to be away from home and seven days is a long time to be away from her Daddy. The vacation turned out longer then I had planned originally. I extended the vacation so that Gerard could so come and spend some time with us on his days off.

Sunday Gerard, Anna and I decided to just stay home alone and I am so glad that we did. I told Gerard that our families are going to start to think that we are crazy but we needed this time together alone. When Anna woke up on Sunday morning she went from room to room pointing at herself then each of her toys both horses got big hugs. It was both cute and a little sad. I imagine now that she may have thought that she was not coming back home to her things. I will admit that it did not dawn on me how she would react coming home. I worried more about how she would react to being in the vacation house. To say that she touched and played with every toy is not an exaggeration.

She did not want Gerard out of her sight. Usually he goes to bed at 6 pm, Anna and I usually read books and play in her room before I rock her to sleep. Around 8 pm she started calling for him and insisted that Gerard and I both lay down with her while she fell asleep, one hand on him and one foot on me.

Here are some random pictures from the rest of the vacation. I think I took about 2000 while I was away. I find it so hard because I just love looking at her.








Sorry it took me so long to answer the question about the oil rig and the effects on Fort Myers Beach. For now I did not see any signs of the oil spill there. I do believe that the effects will be seen in ways that many of us may not realize within the fishing industry. My Brother in law is a fisherman who runs a charter boat as is Jimmy. The fishing industry is a difficult business to be in and a disaster like this one is mind blowing for those who depend on the ocean to make a living. I pray that this issue will be resolved quickly but I think it is far from over.

Fly, butterfly, fly

Yesterday we only spent a short time at the beach instead we decided to spend some time at butterfly resort. Big misjudgement on my part because who knew that would be in a green house. Oh well it was still pretty cool. We saw a bunch of butterflies up close.





Today we stayed in the pool until our fingers were like prunes. I think Anna is really getting the idea of potty training because she tells me when it is time to go and wants out of the pool. I take no credit for the training at all this is all her. Jimmy is quite happy that the potty training is going so well because on more then one occasion Anna has had on a dress with bloomers or a bathing suit and hopped off his lap to tell me she has to go pee-pee.

Now that the rain has stopped we are going to go back to the beach.

Day One at the Vacation House ***Pictures addedd***

This house is a true beach house in every sense of the word. The pool is a warm 88 degrees with plenty of shade and privacy. The side yard has chairs for sitting in the sun. There is a covered area for eating. The pool is fenced in with the door handles that are only at the adult level. One of the bathrooms is modified outdoor full bath. One of my dreams is to have an outside shower at home.

Yesterday, Gerard and I went to visit his Aunt Nel and Walter her friend. The funny thing is Walter is one of the cleanest, neatest people you could ever have met. I am sure having Anna run a muck in his house made him a touch crazy. I owe him at least a case of Windex. In Florida many of the houses have a lot of windows and I do believe that Anna touched everyone on the them. In addition Anna did some redecorating and moved every nick nack in the house. Walter was a good sport. Walter did get me back however and showed Anna how to do a cannon ball!

The Internet is a bit questionable here so I can not seem to get the pictures loaded. I will edit to add the pictures when I get a chance and yes I did get the go ahead to add one of Wilson. I will not label them but I bet you all can figure out which one is "Wilson" when I add them. Have a sunny day!

What a beach

Anna's first real day at the beach was great. From the time she woke up all we heard was "Beach, Beach, Beach!" To make sure that we knew what she was talking about she pointed to the beach in pictures, pamphlets and even off our balcony. We loaded the beach cart and off we went. I have to get a picture of her on the beach cart because she even found a place for her to ride to the beach.

The minute her feet hit the sand the shoes came off and with determination that only Anna has she was headed for the water. Children and water can be fun but there is also a level of danger with the water that I never like to think about. I feel lucky because La-La and Jimmy both also understand so she was covered by four adults when near the water. Jimmy and Anna headed straight for the water and I set up the umbrella.

I am fortunate because I have traveled to many different countries with all different types of beaches. In the south of France when I was visiting the city of Nice I was surprised by the beach because it was all rocks. I think I still have one or two of those rocks at home. Up until today one of my favorite beaches is Myrtle Beach, I hate to say it but I may have a new favorite beach.

The sand here in Ft Myers Beach is like walking on baby powder. The water is warm and not rough at all. Believe it or not I think going to the beach here is much easier then using the pool. The resort where we are staying has two pools today we used the one that was more secluded. The water was the perfect temperature and the pool was had plenty of shade.

Gerard and I have already started to talk about Anna's birthday party. I know it is still months away but quite honestly I am planner. Earlier this week I had decided on a backyard party with a pony but today I am thinking a return trip to here would be better. I leave you all with some pictures. Please note that Anna looks like she is swimming alone but in fact Gerard, Jimmy or La-La actually did have a hold of her foot in the pictures. I just cropped that part out.






By the way nope that is not Gerard but Jimmy. Sorry guys I know he is warming up to the idea. Yes this is Anna's new pose for the camera, Thanks La-La. Also if you say a quick prayer for Jaime and Greg this will be there first long trip in the car with Hans and you all know what that feels like with a 1 year old.

Plan B is nice too

As a plan B we were going to rent a hotel for the two extra nights. Gerard picked one out of the vacation free flyer that not only is nice but will let us have Coconut stay with us too. The bigger bonus is the room is Ocean front for the most part, has 2 beautiful pools, plenty of parking and is close to everything.

Gerard is out picking up the Kefir (Anna's Russian milk) because that is the only thing she will drink. We are in our beach wear and ready to go.

Here is the list of funny things that Anna has done today:

1. Locked the bathroom door
2. Had her plastic dog talk on the phone then I realized the dog WAS talking to some one
3. Suddenly Anna has a new word "BEACH" and yes she does yell it to get her point across.

Once we are home I will post the name of the resort and the beach house that we used if it is nice too.

We are Here!

Yesterday I spent the better part of the day finishing the packing and rechecking the bags. Gone are the days when I could pack one small bag and some quilting for the plane. Although Gerard will say I never packed one small bag for any where. Now I sit back and say "Should I pack the elephant or the tiger?" or "which three books do I need for Anna for the next couples of days?" What a change from over vacations.

When I get home first thing I will do is repack my travel size products. I had some left over from Russia and was surprised in a good way, not to mention the forty dollars I also found. Jimmy and La-La picked up a few things and left last night. Amazing how we will all arrive within minutes of each other, except Jaime, Greg and Hans they leave tomorrow.

Off to the house with the exception of it is rented to another family right now and not available until Saturday. I was banking on it not being rented and being able to extend our week. Oh well I will find a place to stay I'm sure.

The plane ride was fun for the most part. On the way to the airport Anna called up La-La on her foot phone. That just cracks me up. I promise I will edit to add pictures.
The weather is beautiful 92 degrees at 5pm. The clouds are picture perfect, big white and fluffy, the sky is powder blue. I can not wait to dip my feet in the water.

Anna spent most of the plane ride fighting a nap and playing with her little animals. Once the plane landed she freaked out and wanted off. Once we were out of the plane and strapped into her stroller she was out cold for close to 2 hours.

This sky is amazing I wish I could just bottle it up.

Pictures:

Packing & Remembering

Yesterday I got lucky again and took my third call off from work extending my vacation by another week. So I took advantage of Anna having dinner with her Uncle Wayne,Jaime Lynn & Jillian (Hans' Pop Pop) to get a few last minute things done. I was able to run in and out of stores in record time. For a minute it felt like when I was packing to pick up Anna, minus the fear.

One thing that is different is I know I can get just about anything because we are staying in the U.S. When I traveled to Russia I had a fear that I would not be able to get what I needed for her combine that with the inability to communicate effectively due to the language barrier I was nervous. In one respect I was lucky because we were only in Moscow for 2 days before we came home. I could not imagine staying longer.

Taking Anna back on to a plane will remind me of the long day I spent getting ready to leave and getting her settled on the plane just to have the man behind her wake her up for the duration of the flight. Gerard is very amusing on planes because he is very sensitive to noise and will be coming straight from work to the airport so traveling with him is pretty funny.

Gerard is only staying a couple of days so he will return on Sunday and we will not return until the following Saturday. Just like he did nine months ago Gerard will pick us up at the airport. This will be the first time he has been separated from us since she came home. I know she will miss him. I think it will be interesting to see the difference in her when she sees him. This time I will take pictures last time Gerard requested no pictures because he did not want her to be scared but I will remember his face forever. I do think when he picks us up this time I will be stuck with the bags.

Speech Therapy...Oh how funny it can be!

Monday afternoons are speech therapy days. I kind of wish it were earlier in the morning for two reasons. The first reason is Anna has pretty much stopped taking an afternoon nap. I find that it does make the evenings more difficult but I guess it is a trade off because she is usually asleep by 8 pm. I think Anna would do better and perhaps absorb more if the sessions were in the morning but since this is Miss Sara's second job, mornings are impossible. I really like Miss Sara so I will not consider changing therapist.

Miss Sara lives around the corner from me and has a little boy about a year younger then Anna. Perhaps we will be able to be friends once the therapy is over. Maybe even a play date in Anna's future.

I do see some progress with her speech we have been working with Miss Sara for about two months now. Anna has been able to reproduce some new words like "All done, baby, more, please (that one warms my heart)" Anna has not been able to put two words together how ever independently.

I do know she is behind. Miss Sara and I talked about how she should be classified because English is her second language but that will probably not happen. I am scheduled for a meeting with the school district after vacation to discuss pre-school. They will be pushing for 5 days a week 8 hour days. I am still not sure if I will send her at all until next year. I still have time to decide so I will think it over for now.

Here is the funny part. Today during Speech therapy we were working on Peak-A-Boo. Sounds like it should be harmless right? Well Anna was having a bit of a time getting these words out so when she was up to saying Peak-A I was very excited for her. Finally she said it Peak-A-Boo. The thing with speech therapy as with anything is practice. So here is Miss Sara and I praising her and encouraging her to do it again.

So Anna said Peak-A...toot no not the word but the sound that we all make when we eat too many beans! How can you help but not laugh?

Saturday afternoon perfect for a party

Friday night was one of the hardest solo nights Gerard had with Anna. Saturday was the family party for Hans, my God son and Great nephew. Jaime Lynn and Greg had the party at my house. I slept while the party decorations went up. After Friday night I was so relieved to be called off for Saturday night.

What a wonderful day that was for us. I worried that Anna would have some difficulty with the day because she did not sleep well and having so many people around but I was wrong. She did way better then I even imagined that she could do. I am so lucky because my family does now know the routine. Direct Anna to Gerard and I if there is a problem or affection that needs to be given.

Gerard did all the cooking, Jaime Lynn and Greg did the entertaining, Jillian did the photographing of all the special things and I did the holding of Anna. Anna enjoyed having a bunch of 2 and 3 year olds running around the back yard with her. They played in the pool and on the slide.

One of the funniest things that happened was when we put Hans in front of his smash cake. I took him a little bit of trying before he figured it out. S he started to eat and play with the cake then all of a sudden he jumped up and ran away.

By far the biggest hit of the party was the pinata. Anna keeps retelling the story of the pinata. She brings us to the tree, re-enacts swinging the bat and when it breaks and the toys fall out. She has not stopped playing with her new little animal friends.

I'm excited because today is Monday. I know it sounds crazy. Who wishes for Mondays? Me! Today my Mother's day surprise arrives and I will only have two more nights to work before my vacation starts. Here are some of my favorite pictures of the birthday party.

My first call from home

Nights like this make me want to stop working and live in a tent. Although I bet that is expensive too. Don't get me wrong I do not mind working and I like my job but Anna is having a hard time tonight. In honesty she has had a hard time for the last couple of days.

I believe that in the area of attachment we are doing well but there are times when I wonder if what I am seeing is an honest picture or perhaps just what I want to see. For the last two days Anna has not wanted me to be out of her sight. I know that sounds like no big deal but that in conjuction with the fact that she is now bringing me the baby sling to wear and carry her makes me think she is having some anxiety.

Today she sat on my lap most of the day while I organized a few things. Also in the past two days her eating has tappered off again. Today she only wanted bottles. This afternoon when she was playing she started to act like a baby again laying on the floor and fake crying. My heart melts each time this happens because she looks to see if I am coming and then when she sees me or hears me coming she cries even louder. I make a big deal when she does this by scoping her up, rocking her and giving her a bottle. I start to tell her that I love her and that I will always be there for her.

I am working tonight and my heart is breaking because even though she fell asleep at her regular time Gerard just called to say she has been up three times. He got nervous because she has never done this before for him. I know as you read this you are saying "why did he call you?"

I know he called because he got scared that she was not okay. Apparently, she is waking up frantically looking for me. What I believe he is describing is night terrors. She has only done this once before and I was home. I told him to just stay near her and that this will pass.

Oh man this is the part that I really dislike. I have six more hours of work. I will be holding, rocking and feeding babies all night. Soothing their cries and the one who needs me most is home struggling without me.

I need to re-evaluate working or at least re-evaluate working three night a week. Please say a prayer that the worst of the night is over and that she will sleep like a log for the rest of the night.

While I was making the bonnets Anna was....

I finished the bonnet and bloomers for Melissa and Nathan's give away. I will be the first to admit I really really like them. In my mind I picture a little baby girl having her picture taken by Melissa and I can feel my heart smile.

When I sew I will also admit I am messy. I always have been. My house is usually not a wreck but once the sewing comes out all bets are off. Add in a 2 year old playing with her toys and the house turns into a hot mess before you can say "Bob's your uncle" (sorry for the shameless reference to the Dalmatian's movie).

Gerard is know for calling me pretty much all day long. He feels like he miss us and what we are doing. So I was on the phone talking to him, uploading pictures from my camera and finishing up the last bit on the bonnet. When out of the corner of my eye I saw Anna leaning over the coffee table with my scissors in her hands trying to cut her hair.

Yikes! I dropped the phone and scared the day lights out of her but I am happy to report she has not had her first hair cut as of yet! Crisis avoided.

Toys, Toys and more Toys

I believe that for the most part children's toys are very expensive. Forty plus dollars for a plastic barn is out of my price range. Anna does not really frequent the toy area of the major stores but quite honestly some of her favorite toys are ones we have made.

Since Anna started speech therapy Anna has become very interested in the type of toys that have characters who play in houses doors to open and close. I am committed to saving for Anna's education so in order to make sure I am financially secure cuts have to be made in some places. Brand new toys is one area where I have been able to save some money.

Now I am not saying that every toy Anna gets is or will be used but why does she need a new toy every week that is brand new? I do believe that we live in a world of excessive spending. I point the finger at myself when I say this so please do not think I am judging everyone.

I feel lucky that I have the ability to buy these toys new but am able to have enough restraint to find them in one of the local thrift stores instead. As a result of saving money this way I feel comfortable with what I am spending for us to take a vacation.

I want Anna to know the value of a dollar. I want her to learn that hard work is rewarded. Saving for the future is necessary. We have a little bank account for Anna nothing big Gerard and I put the last three digits of our paychecks into this account. We make a point of taking Anna with us and telling her what we are doing. The bank account is one of the old fashion ones, a passport account. Anna has at times also received money gifts that have also gone into this account. We also recycle copper pieces from some of Gerard's extra jobs. That was the other reason why she was at the junk yard last week. Anna received a "paycheck" for her help in loading and unloading the copper.

I guess my point is I think in the past I have wasted so much money on things that were meaningless. My biggest goals are to have my home paid for outright, save enough to help (not pay for completely) Anna with her college education and live a lifestyle that is comfortable.

So here it is I spent less then 10 dollars and got all of these toys. Anna has played for hours with them and I feel good that the money went to charity, never mind there will be less plastic in a landfill.
I just love this picture of Hans


The Bisquick bottle they love that one

I'm One of Two

In Russia tonight there is a woman who may not openly be celebrating Mother's day. Anna's first Mother will never know how much I think and care for her. When we pray at night I always mention her first family in Russia because even though Anna and I may never meet or converse with them they are also her family.

When I was in Russia on my first trip I saw a picture of Anna's Mother. Unfortunately for Anna I was not able to have this picture. I have toyed with the idea of doing a birth family search but for now for reasons I am not willing to discuss I have decided against that for now but I decided that in the near future I will do that search.

Tomorrow is Mother's day I will celebrate the day with Gerard and Anna. I will get to pick Anna up any time she wants me. I will be able to hug and kiss her all day long. I will be able to watch Anna laugh, run and play. In Russia, there is a woman who will not get the chance to behold this beautiful gift. I wish I had the chance to thank Anna's first Mother for giving me the chance to be Anna's forever Mother.

So there you have it, I am one of two woman who Anna can call Mama.

A hot mess I tell you

Thursday is what I lovingly refer to as the in between day. This is the 12 hour span on time when I am off between my 2 shifts. Jillian usually watches Anna in the morning a bit then Gerard takes her out to the park and for a ride to get french fries. All of this is done so that I can sleep. Bless their hearts because even though I must sleep they know if Anna is in the house I will not sleep but instead just want to be with her.

This morning Anna, Jillian also known as La-La, Hans, and Jaime also known as Me-Me went for a walk before I even got home. Gerard had arrangements to pick her up from them so I was banished to bed. Mostly I think because I am in a cycle of not sleeping. I have only been sleeping in 2 hour spans here and there. Gerard would never say it to me but I have been a little cranky lately.I hope this weekend I am able to catch up on some sleep.

Which brings me to the switch off between La-La and Gerard. Anna usually points and says DaDa for any dark haired man in a truck which in the area where there are many men who fit that description more on that later. So Anna noticed Gerard on their walk and the switch occurred. This all sounds a little covert doesn't it.

At 4:30 pm I was done I wanted my baby home and called to tell him so. It took some time to wrangle her away from the rooster that she had found at the park where they were playing no not a concrete one but a live rooster. Off to home they drove. Now I needed someone there taking my picture as I was waiting by the window for her to come home. I walked out as they pulled up and a tired little Anna just reached up for me and said baba.

As I was feeding her and holding her Gerard gave me the run down on the day. She was exhausted but even funnier was she was a hot mess. There was something sticky in her hair and when I kissed her forehead I could tell that at some point she had been a little sweaty. I guessed it was from chasing the rooster but nope I was wrong.

Are you ready? Gerard took her to the junk yard! Oh she had fun and I stayed with her the whole time I was told. They were running a muck looking for roof racks for my car and a grill for his. I was assured that she had quite a bit of fun. I can just picture it in my head.

During my wait I had been told I was going to get a boy. We talked about all the things that he would do with a boy then surprise...It's a girl! I will say it took Gerard a bit of time to get adjusted to the idea but know it feels so natural to have a girl and I would not change a thing. I laugh because Gerard tells me Anna is like having both, she will play with a worm then rock her baby to sleep.

Yes she got a nice long bath face, hands, feet and hair all washed.

Why Blog? Also a Great Big Give Away

So why blog? Anna is home. Life is good on all a counts. Why did I start blogging? Both are good questions that I think I can answer. In the beginning I started this blog so that I could talk my fool head off about my pending adoption with strangers. Sounds crazy right. Not really though and here is the reason why. I still wanted friends after my adoption was completed. Let's be honest I have a one track mind and can be annoying.

I can wear a person out after all. I did not want my friends to say "Don't get her started about the adoption...PLEASE!" Now you all know to some degree I am just joking but to a bigger degree I am not. When you are just starting the process there is a lot of unknown stuff that can be quite scary. At times I remember thinking this may not happen. I also believe in the power of positive thinking. I think it is easier to stay positive when you have so many people praying for you and staying positive. I have never really felt it to be helpful when I am bombarded with negative questions.

Here is what I did not expect! New friends that I gained through blogging. I remember the first blog I read. Iliya was home only a couple of days. Looking at his pictures and hearing Melissa and Nathan's story was a turning point for Gerard and I. At first Gerard was pretty set against adopting and living a life without children. Shocking to say that now knowing the way he is with her and how being away from her for any period of time is difficult for him. Yes I get about 40 calls a day just to see what we are doing.

Iliya is now 4 years old and the time has come for Melissa and Nathan to adopt again. Adoption however is not for the faint of heart and is quite expensive. Look for the positive in everything I do often say. So here is a solution A Great Big Give away! Everyone is a winner in my opinion with this option. First of all I am a sucker for raffles...LOVE them in fact. Helping to raise funds could bring them one step closer to bring home their child. To be honest I just love to see her photographs and dream about having her do family portraits for us so just reading along is a positive thing for me.

So this is what I am thinking. Melissa is going to have at least one more raffle. I want to donate to the cause. You all know how I feel about handmade things and that every child should have at least one thing that is handmade. Put that together with the obvious baby theme all this equals baby bonnets. Yup Melissa has agree to let me give her some bonnets for her raffle. What is a bonnet without bloomers so that is what I am going to make.

Today is a Sloan-Kettering day so I think if the wait is long I may run over to the fashion district to look for a special lace or other trim for the set. No two bonnets come out the same but here is a picture of ones I have done in the past. I really like the pale pink lining so I think that will be a must.

Also drop by and put in 5 dollars you could win an Apple iPad or my dream photography session. The anticipation is killing me.

Some times this is what you miss

I think it is neat that Anna gets excited. At times she is impatient and that is neat too. In the mornings she has been sleeping in longer then me which is nice because I am able to have a couple of minutes to myself.

When Anna first came home she would wake up slip out of bed a little dazed and confused. That turned into the minute her eyes were open the feet had to touch the ground and roaming around the house was the business at hand. After about a 2 months of that I started to sit where she could see me when she turned the corner and would call her name. At that point she was sleeping with at least 2 stuffed animals she would be clutching both of them or a pillow or her blanket. We would sit on the couch for a couple of minutes. I really enjoyed this time with Anna.

Times have changed again. Even though I do miss seeing her walk around the corner with her animals I think I am really enjoying this change too. Now she calls my name from the bed. The morning here are pretty quiet so I do usually hear her the first time she calls me. Now we snuggle in the bed while I give her a morning bottle. One she is done with that the next thing out of her mouth every morning is "DaDa?"

I think it is neat that she looks for him too. Gerard is never here in the morning except for once a week when I work but he does call every morning to see if she is up. I tell him that she was asking for him but I know seeing the excitement is way better.

I do believe in the old saying of a picture is worth a thousand words. So I had an idea to take her picture while she was waiting for him yesterday to come home. I told him to call when he got close which just made it more exciting for her because she could hear his voice.

Some times these are the things that you miss.