More Documents Sent Out and Random Thoughts

Today I got a little more paperwork done for the second part of the dossier. I sent out my birth certificates, Residency Statement and Employment letter for the apostitles. Because I am not sure which region that I will be assigned to because the Dossier is still in the translation phase I made the decision to have both a New Jersey State police and a FBI criminal background check completed. I am 100% sure that I am jumping the gun for this and that I will have to redo these steps but it made me feel better to get them done today. So when I complain about having to redo these documents please remind me that it is my fault.

I finished my Cultural Diversity class today. One more down and 3 more to go. Actually I already started another one so only 2 more to go. I just can not wait to be done with this degree.

This is where my post will get a little sad so stop reading if you are already sad today. I insist. Today is the anniversary of my Father's death 11 long years. I miss him everyday. I have also turned another year older. My father did not want to die on my birthday so he waited a couple of extra hours. His death has affected so greatly. I often feel cheated that he is not here with me. I remember so many good things about him but unfortunately I am traumatized by his death and all the events that occurred directly after that time in my life.

My Father died a couple of months before I was to be married. I remember being so upset by his death and feeling so shocked that others could just go on as though this event never happened. I cancelled my wedding and I have not been able to move past that point of walking down the aisle without my Father. Gerard has been so understanding, wonderful and as supportive as he can be. I pray one day that I will be at peace with everything enough to marry him.

Please anyone that reads this post understand that I do reserve this day only to be sad about my Father's death. The rest of the year I celebrate life and all that life brings. I pray that next year will be completely different. The funny thing about this is Gerard keeps telling me that the little one will not understand why there is no birthday cake for Mommy so suck it up. He is right. I promise that next year there will be cake, presents and balloons. No tears allowed.
Here are some of my favorite pictures of us.


Here we are after I won a beauty pagent. Now that is some big hair!!



Jenny (My little Sister), My Father and Me! I look really good in a two piece!



Seeing him at work


This is the one I keep on my dresser.

Hmmm What is Different? About 18 Inches!

Okay no new adoption information. My dossier is still in the translation phase. Next week I am going to start my search for an account who will verify my assets, debts and income. Oh what fun? Because I am not assigned to a specific region as of yet I do not know whether or not I need a State Police Clearance or a FBI clearance. I will bet that I will need an FBI clearance but you know how international adoptions are so I was thinking about getting both. I figure it can not hurt. I know exactly what they will find so I am good to go. By the way I have a sparklingly clean record. Yah for me.

Know this brings me to the title of this post. Can anyone tell what is different? You guessed it I cut my hair. In total about 18 inches worth was donated to the Locks of Love organization. This is one thing about me that makes Gerard crazy he like my hair to stay long. I love however to donate the hair for others to use. So every couple of years I chop it off. By no means is my hair short now but in his mind it is very short. It took me a couple of days to get used to so that is the reason why I have not mentioned it.



Okay anyone that has read a little bit of this blog knows about my camera phobia, which by the way I think I am starting to get over. Some of my favorite posts on the blogs that I read are the ones that have pictures attached. It amazes me that people can take such beautiful pictures of their children because in my opinion I think it has to be pretty hard to get some of these great shots.

Dottie with her toes in the water

Because I have been trying to practice taking pictures and today was so beautiful I decided to take Dottie to the beach. The sun was shining and the temperature was close to 60 degrees. Now all of you who read this blog and are blessed with warm weather stop laughing at me that is really warm for New Jersey in March. Anyway I think I may be getting the hang of taking my own picture. Here are the results of the day.


Thinking about the day I will travel across the atlantic for my Little One!

No News But Lots of Shopping

Everything has been pretty quiet on the adoption home front. I am settling in with the idea that the dossier is in Moscow and being translated. I really do not expect to hear anything for a couple of months. During this whole process I have tried to set my sights on the worst possible case scenario. I have to say I have been pleasantly surprised each time I do this so I am just going to keep plugging along.

So you ask "what have I been doing because there are no new posts here on the blog." I have picked up so extra time at work to save a little bit of money. Then there is school, I have been able to keep up with that also; two more weeks and I have one more class done. What else hmmm let me see oh yes SHOPPING!

I do not know about anyone else but the sales this year have been great. I have gotten so many great buys on things that I will use. See I have been seeing Susan's therapist Mr. Kohls and he is just wonderful. I got a pair of Levis with the adjustable waist for 90 cents and a shirt to match for 60 cents. I found PJs for 1.75 so I got one is every size. I look at it this way I have it and it will cost me more when I am not working as much.

For some reason every time I bring something into the house for the baby Dottie goes crazy. She wages her tail, sniffs the bags up and down. I even found her trying on some of the clothes. I will leave you with the picture.



Fishing hat 25 cents. Dottie putting it on priceless.

Who Knew His Children Were Adopted?

I have started to put together the rest of the documents that I will need for the dossier for in between trips. I just had a feeling that some of these documents might be difficult to get after reading about how others are having a hard time getting the FBI clearance back in time. I am waiting to find out which region I have been assigned so I will know whether I need an FBI clearance or a state police clearance.

So I figured let me get some of the other ones done. I figured if I work on getting one a week done then life will be grand. So this week I decided to run other to the municipal building and get the proof of residence done. Sounds easily right? Wrong! I go into the offices and state my case to the clerk behind the counter and she tells me:

Clerk: "No, The Tax Assessor will not sign a document like this because he does not know that you live in the house."

Crazy Paper Pregnant Woman: "What do you mean? I have lived in this town and owned a residence here for 18 years? I pay my taxes!"

Clerk: "We do not know whether you REALLY live there maybe you live somewhere else?"

Crazy Paper Pregnant Woman: "If I lived somewhere else I would go that town for the paper to be signed! I vote in this town. All my bills go to this address. My home study for the adoption goes to this address. I live here."

Clerk: "Sorry we do not do this type of thing."

Crazy Paper Pregnant Woman: "Can I leave a note for the Tax Assessor or speak to him? May be if I explain it to him he will understand?"

Clerk: "You can leave the paper and your number but I am not sure when he will be able to get around to looking at this? He is a very busy man!"

CPPW: "What? Okay I will leave the stuff you and check back in 2 days."

I go to work and stew about it all night long (Working the nightshift). I develop my plan of action. Because I live in such a small town and Gerard is pretty politically active within the town he knows everyone and most of them owe him a favor. He tells me not to worry we will get it signed.

So I go home and go to bed. Around 1 pm (also known as 1am to a nightshift worker) the doorbell rings. I stumble out of bed throw on a robe and answer the door which I usually do not do. Guess who is there? The Tax Assessor! He starts off with apology and tells me he signed the paper and that he wanted to bring it to me so that I did not have to go back in to town. This is about a 1 mile drive.

Standing there I am thinking what is going on is this a dream? Am I crazy? How scary was I at the Tax Assessors office for him to hand deliver the paper? The answer is this is not a dream, I am not crazy, and I was not even that scary. He had adopted his 2 children about 15 years ago internationally. Apparently, we are one of the only couples in town who has or will be adopting recently. He apologized for the clerk after he heard what she told me. He told her to never do that again but to just call him and he would always sign those papers.

Wonderful Tax Assessor: "You brought back so many wonderful memories for me. Please bring the little one to the office when he gets here."

I know I am getting a bit long but thank God for the Tax Assessors. This has gotten me to thinking Jesus is truly watching over us. Jesus knew that the Tax collectors needed him and his guidance so that they could be saved and live a righteous life. I guess JC knows what he is doing!

You're Going To Miss This

I was driving in the car last night on my way home from work and I heard a song by Trace Adkins titled "You're Going to Miss This". I started thinking about how so many things have changed. Honestly, I must be one of those weird people that have really enjoyed this whole process. I have not minded filling out the paperwork or the cost or anything.

After listening to this song I really thought about it this is my paper pregnancy and I love it. Unlike many who are adopting I have not had any infertility treatments. Gerard and I believed that if God did not intervene and help us to become pregnant then this was not his plan. At first he thought that we were just not supposed to be parents. When I brought up adoption he was very unsure. I am not sure if I have mentioned on this yet but he completely changed his mind when he saw the referral video of Melissa and Nathan's little boy Iliya.



Gerard loves idea that I have started a blog. I think he realizes how much this blog and reading other blogs have helped me to understand the process. Reading about everyone's experience has helped me to feel like any set back that I have had during this process is normal and that others have been waiting much longer then us.

Yesterday I showed Gerard a picture of Carey and Norman's little girl. His face lit up at the sight of her. We have not requested a specific gender but I have been telling him that because of the long wait for a girl we will probably be getting a boy. Since seeing Carey's little treasure he is now asking "Have you bought any dresses?"

Additional Documents Needed. Who knew that would happen?

What will I do when there are no more documents that need to be collected, notarized and apostilled? What will I do with my time? I have to say I am a little nervous about finishing up all the paperwork. Now before any of you think I am crazy I know that the paperwork will truly never be done.

I am afraid that once I am not having to put together documents and wait for the postman I will start to get anxious about waiting for a referral. I think the best way to combat this is to start to make a few lists of things that need to be done prior to traveling.

My agency contacted me yesterday and asked for a few additional documents (4 in total). I already have 2 out the 4 in an envelope addressed and ready to be mailed. I need one additional document from my home study agency which I emailed them a copy today. By far the funniest document that I did not include in the initial dossier package that I sent last week was pictures of me.

How I forgot to include these pictures is beyond me. Even funnier is I hate getting my picture taken. I know you are all saying we see your face on this blog more often then we would like to see but the reality is that I am trying to get used to having my picture taken again.

One interesting fact about me is that I used to be a beauty queen. This is a little known fact. In my younger years I would compete in beauty pageants. I loved everything about them, and then one day I got too busy to put on make up and do my hair. I keep asking my friends "when are you going to nominate me for What Not to Wear?"