Everything is down!

This year Gerard and I decided to undecorate the house earlier than usual. The decision was made because tomorrow I start back to school for 16 more weeks. I have loved having the break from school because I have been able to spend more time just being Anna's Mom rather then having a paper loom over my head. I will not lie I question my decision to return to school but Gerard and I both agree that me being in school will benefit our family in the future. I so wish I had completed all my schooling prior to Anna's arrival home.

For Anna it was a little sad as we took down the decorations. I was even scolded and put into "time-out" for removing the decorations from the tree. I held her, told her that the decorations will be back before she knows it but this was of little comfort to her. I started to removed the decorations much slower and we talked about it. I found it helpful that I had printed out photobooks from the last two Christmas to show her that the tree, and decorations will be back. I left the box out for Anna to look through the ornaments. I did find her redecorating the tree.

So the tree stood bare with the exception of the lights and the star. I had told Gerard that I thought it might be better if the tree disappeared much like it came but I was out ranked since I did not have the strength to disassemble the tree. Without notice he walked in took down the tree, and put it in the box.

Anna's face started to get red, and her eyes teared up. I asked Gerard to stop which he did. The three of us sat, talked about our tree, hugged it, and the box. I think Gerard did not believe me when I told him she was going to be upset but he got the picture as her hot little tears streamed down her face.

Gerard finished boxing the tree while I held Anna. We promised her that she could go into the attic anytime she needed to see it was still here. (Our attic has a finished floor) That made her feel better. She has not asked about the tree since that day.

I think the reason why I am writing about Anna's reaction is this year was the first year that she has truly started to understand. Her attachment to us has grown so strong in the past 6 months. The tears that she cried were true tears of plain, ordinary sadness. Anna was able to tell us why she was upset which for so long was not able to communicate that to us. Even though this was a seemly sad moment for Anna I see that keeping her close to us and limiting those who have taken care of her has been a big help for Anna.

Saturday we will celebrate Christmas with Gerard's family on Saturday which is also Orthodox Christmas. Even though we are not Orthodox many Russians are so I feel as though this may become a new tradition for us.